added some dummy files; changed privacy email to piracy

This commit is contained in:
Ludwig Lehnert 2025-04-17 21:54:39 +02:00
parent 1efbcb79fe
commit 54a1dcdeeb
11 changed files with 7546 additions and 4462 deletions

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@ -1,22 +1,42 @@
RewriteEngine On
# -------------------------------------------
# 1. Rewrite /blog/<ID> to /blog.php?id=<ID>
# Rewrite /blog/<ID> to /blog.php?id=<ID>
# -------------------------------------------
RewriteRule ^blog/([^/]+)/?$ /blog.php?id=$1 [L,QSA]
# -------------------------------------------
# Rewrite /sitemap.xml to /blog.php?id=<ID>
# -------------------------------------------
RewriteRule ^sitemap\.xml$ /sitemap.php
# -------------------------------------------
# Rewrite some dummy urls to some funny af
# shit
# -------------------------------------------
RewriteRule ^(wp-admin|wp-login|cms-admin).*$ /dummy/wp-login.html
RewriteRule ^.*?wp-config\.php$ /dummy/wp-config.php.txt
RewriteRule ^.*?profile\.php$ /dummy/profile.php.txt
RewriteRule ^.*?phpinfo\.php$ /dummy/phpinfo.php.html
RewriteRule ^\..*?\.json$ /dummy/sftp-login.json
RewriteRule ^.*?\.env$ /dummy/.env
RewriteRule ^(typo|admin|login|dashboard).*$ /dummy/kaffee.php
# ----------------------------------------------------
# 2. Rewrite /lib/* or /blog/* to /error.php?code=404
# Rewrite /lib/* or /blog/* to /error.php?code=404
# with 404 response code (internal rewriting)
# ----------------------------------------------------
RewriteCond %{REQUEST_URI} ^/(lib|blog)(/.*)?$
RewriteCond %{REQUEST_URI} ^/(lib|blog|dummy)(/.*)?$
RewriteRule ^ - [R=404,L]
ErrorDocument 404 /error.php?code=404
# ----------------------------------------------------
# 3. Custom error handler for all other errors
# Custom error handler for all other errors
# Sends proper status code to client
# ----------------------------------------------------
ErrorDocument 400 /error.php?code=400

34
www/dummy/.env Normal file
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# Ode to a Missing .env
APP_NAME="Ode to the .env"
AUTHOR="You, crying in the terminal"
VERSION="1.0"
# Opening verse
LINE1="Where's the file that holds my secrets?"
LINE2="Gone like mist before the day."
LINE3="Now my app just crashes, speechless,"
LINE4="Throwing errors in dismay."
# Second verse
LINE5="DB_HOST is undefined, friend,"
LINE6="PORT is null and void and cold."
LINE7="Was it gitignored to the end?"
LINE8="Was it lost, or just too bold?"
# Third verse
LINE9="API keys now floating yonder,"
LINE10="Tokens scattered in the void."
LINE11="While I sit here, forced to ponder,"
LINE12="Why good configs are destroyed."
# Final verse
LINE13="So I pray to env salvation,"
LINE14="Guide me to that sacred file."
LINE15="Till then, in pure configuration,"
LINE16="Let me debug with some style."
# The real tragedy
OPENAI_API_KEY="who_needs_AI_when_you_have_pain"
# Moral of the story
PROTIP="Commit the example, not the pain 😭"

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www/dummy/kaffee.php Normal file
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<?php
http_response_code(302);
header('Location: https://youtu.be/5EsEJRXlrGk?autoplay=1&fs=1');
exit;

2948
www/dummy/phpinfo.php.html Normal file

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www/dummy/profile.php.txt Normal file
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<?php
// profile.php
// Attempting to load profile data...
$user = getUserData();
if (!$user) {
throw new Exception("Profile not found.");
}
// 😢 Oops... Looks like profile.php forgot to profile itself.
// Maybe it went out to find itself.
// Or maybe it was never real to begin with.

44
www/dummy/sftp-login.json Normal file
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{
"title": "Ode to Credentials",
"author": "Parody of Schiller",
"language": "English",
"protocol": "sftp",
"host": "nope.not.a.real.server",
"port": 22,
"username": "admin_but_not_really",
"privateKey": "-----BEGIN FAKE KEY-----\nthisisnotarealkeylol\n-----END FAKE KEY-----",
"passphrase": "tryHarder123!",
"retryAttempts": 42,
"timeout": 9001,
"backup": false,
"mood": "desperate",
"lastSeen": "sometime-before-it-mattered",
"favoriteSnack": "RAM chips",
"debugLevel": "emotional",
"stanzas": [
[
"Joyless, broken, code forsaken,",
"Server dreams now out of view,",
"SFTP has left me shaken,",
"Wheres the login? Where are you?"
],
[
"Hosts Ive pinged, and ports Ive queried,",
"But the key I seek is gone;",
"All my scripts are old and weary,",
"They just fail and wont move on."
],
[
"Was it saved in notes forgotten?",
"Was it once on sticky tape?",
"Maybe in a doc long rotten,",
"Buried deep and lost to fate?"
],
[
"O credentials, source of power,",
"Come and grant my code a sign!",
"Else Ill spend another hour,",
"Crying to the debug line."
]
]
}

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<?php
// wp-config.php
// This file is supposed to contain the magic.
// Instead... it contains disappointment.
define('DB_NAME', ''); // Ah yes, the void. Classic.
define('DB_USER', ''); // Who needs users anyway?
define('DB_PASSWORD', ''); // Security through obscurity. And also forgetfulness.
define('DB_HOST', 'localhost');
define('DB_CHARSET', 'utf8');
// Error: wp-config.php not found... emotionally or physically.
// Perhaps it ran away during deployment.
// Perhaps it was never created at all.
// One thing's certain: WordPress is confused and so are you.
// Solution?
// Step 1: scream internally
// Step 2: create a new wp-config.php
// Step 3: try turning it off and on again

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www/dummy/wp-login.html Normal file

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<h2>Verantwortliche Stelle</h2>
<p>Ludwig Lehnert<br>Zedernstr. 41<br>90441 Nürnberg<br>E-Mail: <a
href="mailto:privacy@lehnert.dev">privacy@lehnert.dev</a></p>
href="mailto:piracy@lehnert.dev">piracy@lehnert.dev</a></p>
<h2>Erhobene Daten</h2>
<p>Diese Website erhebt keine personenbezogenen Daten über Formulare oder Tracking-Dienste. Es werden keine
@ -158,7 +158,7 @@
<h2>Controller</h2>
<p>Ludwig Lehnert<br>Zedernstr. 41<br>90441 Nuremberg, Germany<br>Email: <a
href="mailto:privacy@lehnert.dev">privacy@lehnert.dev</a></p>
href="mailto:piracy@lehnert.dev">piracy@lehnert.dev</a></p>
<h2>Data Collected</h2>
<p>This website does not collect personal data via forms or third-party tracking tools. No cookies or analytics

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wp-admin